What is Belonging?

Sumaiya Khan (15) writes about her understanding of Belonging, reflecting on her experiences at school in East London and thinking about what can be done better.

Belonging is the feeling of being accepted and included in a community for who someone is, and not feeling excluded for one's differences.
This is different from diversity or inclusion, as although those words mean to include someone in a group, belonging means to make them feel accepted in said group.

Belonging works together with diversity and inclusion. Although diversity and inclusion ensure the presence of multiple groups of people in social settings, belonging is needed as well, to make sure that people of different groups feel comfortable in said social settings. Belonging is essential to make the most out of the diversity and inclusion that is being cultivated.

Belonging is essential to make the most out of the diversity and inclusion that is being cultivated.

Making people feel a sense of belonging is important as people are more likely to participate in group activities if they feel like they belong. As explained by thing such as the "Need to Belong” theory, humans have a psychological need to feel accepted in social groups, so if someone feels as if they aren't accepted, they'll try to find that elsewhere.

In the context of schoolchildren in minority groups, this can lead to them being at risk of joining gangs or being trafficked. This also causes them to seek belonging through their peers, meaning an increase of children acting out in lessons in order to feel a sense of acceptance and validation, which overall disrupts all students. A lack of belonging may also cause children to become socially withdrawn from their peers, as if they don't feel accepted, they'll see no reason to interact with classmates. Overall, we can see that a lack of belonging can cause adverse effects in the classroom, as well as outside, which proves the importance of belonging.

By creating a sense of belonging in schools, students will feel more inclined to participate in school activities, and will be less likely to skip out on school. This in turn increases the attendance of schoolchildren, as well as causes grades to increase, and children who feel like they belong are often happier, which reflects in their interactions, as well as their schoolwork.

Children who feel like they belong are often happier, which reflects in their interactions, as well as their schoolwork

There are many barriers that prevent people from feeling like they belong in a social setting. One of these is a lack of role models. If a B.A.M.E child doesn't see themselves represented in social settings (e.g. they're one of the only few black people in a white-dominated school), they'll be more likely to feel as if they're not meant to be in that place.

Another barrier is unconscious bias - stereotypes about other groups of people that we tend to hold unintentionally. This is especially a problem in schools, as if teachers are being unconsciously biased towards certain groups of students (e.g, assuming a B.A.M.E student can't speak English, assuming an SEN child can't make decisions for themselves, etc.), this makes said student feel singled out, making them feel different and excluded from the rest of their peers.

Personally, I feel a sense of belonging at my school, however, I am of a majority group in my school, being a Pakistani child in a school dominated by South Asians. Even though I feel like I'm included in my school life, I know other groups of students (black students, LGBTQIA+ students, etc.) don't feel the same way. There is a lot of discrimination in my school against minority groups, both from teachers and students and a lot of my peers feel socially excluded at school. For example, one of my LGBTQIA+ classmates has become the target of discrimination and bullying, and since teachers in my school tend to be anti-LGBTQIA+, this causes the feeling that they're not meant to be there - that they don't belong. Although I feel included, I'm speaking from my own biased perspective, and understand that a lot of students don't feel that same sense of belonging and inclusion that I do, being part of a majority group in my school.

There is a lot of discrimination in my school against minority groups, both from teachers and students and a lot of my peers feel socially excluded at school.

I believe that one of the main problems when it comes to students feeling as if they belong in my school is the normalization of discrimination. I've have multiple instances where a student is being a target of bullying within a classroom, and teachers sit there, not doing anything to resolve the issue or even attempt to defend the student, instead pushing the blame onto the students who are quiet for being "bystanders", despite the fact that as teachers, they choose to not do anything despite the authority and power that they hold. This could potentially be solved through adequate teacher training, informing teachers of what to do in the event that a student is being discriminated against.

one of the main problems when it comes to students feeling as if they belong in my school is the normalization of discrimination

If we as students see teachers stand up for students more often, this will create a sense of acceptance, and the feeling that we have someone looking out for us, ready to defend us in the event that we become targets for ridicule. This creates a sense of trust between teachers and students, creating a closer relationship between the two groups, and making students feel more inclined to listen to and respect teachers, which in turn reduces the amount of students acting out in class, as well as improves grades. This will also cause students who regularly ridicule others to no longer have a platform to do such, which may lead to them picking on students less in general, not just in the classroom. This lowers the stress of teachers, as they would therefore have less problems to worry about when teaching a classroom. Overall, this would have a positive impact on students and teachers alike.

If we as students see teachers stand up for students more often, this will create a sense of acceptance, and the feeling that we have someone looking out for us, ready to defend us in the event that we become targets for ridicule.